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September 1st, 2025
Welcome to the 84th issue of De Programmatica Ipsum, about Spreadsheets. In this edition, we declare spreadsheets the most popular software programming environment of all time; in the Library section, we learn how to use Lotus 1-2-3 for science reading "Spreadsheet Physics" by Charles Misner and Patrick Cooney; and in our Vidéothèque section, we discover that Excel is a Turing-complete, functional programming language through the eyes of Dr. Felienne Hermans.
by Adrian Kosmaczewski
Spreadsheets are the de facto most popular programming environment ever created. Purchase decisions for entire families of personal computers have been made solely on the availability (or lack thereof) of a particular spreadsheet application. There is arguably more structured data stored in spreadsheets than in any other support ever invented by mankind. And it is frankly inconceivable to imagine a modern computing platform, either on the desktop or mobile, without any sort of spreadsheet software available for it.
Today we are going to talk about a person in a quest to let everyone know that the most popular functional programming language in the world is none other than Microsoft Excel. Yes, the claim sounds outlandish, debatable, laughable, even ridiculous, but she has both data and anecdotal experience backing her point, and this month's Vidéothèque movie is a brilliant presentation of it. Also, let us be honest; as software developers it is our duty to use our beloved brains, and go past the mocking stages in order to learn and embrace the unknown; in this case, the language used by most of the modern business world to communicate: spreadsheets.
Given the pervasiveness and versatility of computers in our world of 2025 it is easy to ignore that 80 years ago they were initially conceived as what we would call today a calculator, specifically created to solve tedious mathematical problems. Of course, users of TikTok, Call of Duty, YouTube, Visual Studio Code, or even readers of this website through some web browser like Firefox are usually (and blissfully) unaware of the gazillion computations per second that it takes to produce everything you see on screen.
